This is prolly my first rant on this blog. And I think more is sure to follow.

It's going to be my birthday in less than an hour and I am in an awe-fucking-some mood.
Get ready:

It's so fucking annoying. It really is. I had been informing my mother since the past 4 days ke Mama jee this is my plan, okay? With her saying "Nahiiiiiii betaaa". I JUST wanted to go to Kalar Kahar for the sake of fun and getting away from everyone here for a few freaking hours C'MON! Chalo koi nai, my friends will convince her. Haina? Yeah, they called and she says: "mein anushay se baat kar ke apko batati hoon beta." She talks to Anushay. Again. Anushay goes over the plan. Again. No problemo mama it's okay atleast you are letting me go.
So I am all jumpy jumpy happy shappy "meri budday hai baiii" not letting ANYONE forget. And this day starts. 30th March. My parents not assuring mein wether I am allowed to go out for the whole day or not, they ignore me constantly & keep changing the topic whenever i bring *the* day up. Oh well. Fine.
So today I am sitting with Ama and she asks:
"beta what do you want for your birthday?"
"kuch nai ama"
"Btw, tum larkiyon ka kia plan hai?"
=. Anushay repeats the plan fo rthe 6th time since the past 4 days and sighs. Phir bhi koi masla nai they are letting me go baiiiii.
I m STILL not sure wtf is happening and I tell a friend. It is followed by 7 phonecalls to me to confirm what the hell was going to happen tomorrow. KOI NAI! BIRTHDAY KA SCENE TO ON HAI NA!
So, baba is watching the news and I am going towards the phone to recieve yet another phone call and he announces:
"Bai mulk ke halaat dekho koi ghar se bahar nahi ja raha"
"Um babi, it's my birthday kal.."
"To? Koi nai ja ra to koi nai ja ra"
=. I tell my friends. they convince me to talk to my dad. they thought that was going to get somewhere. ha! I go to mama instead.
"ama ye KYA hai yar"
Ama is already on the phone with one of her Khalas who are repeating what daddy said. ACH. Bai mulk k halaat kharaab hein Anushay ko ghar mein bandd kar do.
Kal agar Anushay kahay ke mujhay college jana hai magar ek suicide bomber gate pe khara ho ga to majaal hai ke ap anushay ko rokein ge. Naiki ka kaam karti hai na college ja ke.
Koi nai, mom says I can go ahead. Without telling anyone. Wah bai. No one in the family is suppose to know that I am going out. Woh bhi ek friggin brunch pe. WHAT BAI?
Ach so it's 10:30 and the light is out and I am sitting with baba VERY bummed out and bhai comes in:
bhai:"baba mein zara bahar ja ra hoon"
Baba:"okay fine beta."
Anushay: =
Baba:"Oye btw, anushay ka cake letay ana."
Baba:" kyun bai baraan bajay se pehlay he ghar ana hai"
bhai:*uncertain*"haaaaan jeee aa he jaoun ga."
Anushay:*=*"Yaar forget it i'll get my cake tomorrow we'll cut it at tea time. Koi masla nai hai"
Baba:"Dekh lo beta. We always cut the cake at midnight. Chalo, apki marzi. I don't care" Sheesh thanksss babssiiii

So these fucking mulk ke halaat kharaab are for me naa. Subha BRUNCH pe jana hai meiney.Talaybaan bhi mere pechay he aien ge na. Raat ko to koi masla he nai bhai ne jana hai tab mulk k halaat are momentarily fine. Fine.

And I had been calling my darzi convincing him to gimme back one jora of mine so I can wear *new* clothes on my birthday. *smiles* And he miraculously said "Jee kapray tayaar hein" And i m amazed. Wow. Kapray tayaar hein. Something HAS to be wrong. In addition, I had an online chat with my taya abu and he said he'll sponsor me and I should go to hm to london in the summer vacs. I was happy. Another clue: Something HAD to be wrong.
So I happily go to my darzi and...yes...usnay ghalat kapray si kar de diay hein..=S..i m all sari hoi come home and try them on to show ama..did she help or what
"Beta, this gacho...umm...please aur na banana..mein to pehlay he keh rai thi acha nai lagay ga. and you look horrible in sleeveless." Thank you Ama. I am already having the best day ever.
I was 20 feet away from her and she coudln't even see me properly and I could see her shaking her head in disapproval. And after this she gave me her disapproving look, the eyes brows raised and avioding any eye contact with me. Thank you so much I am having a lot of fun already.
They still haven't told me if it's okay for me to go kal subha.
And I was asking her for something and she goes like "Itni kya tayariyaan hein what's so special about this day?" hmm let's see..the fact I have friends who love me and who have a heck of a time whenever we go out and who are sitting there so excited for my birthday.
Instead: "woh ama iskay baad to meiney sab ki tarah budhi ho jaoun gi na..last teen year naa"

And I think I am going to be ranting about the horrible day I had tomorrow.


  1. Maryam said...
    I have only one thing to say.
    Anushay. said...
    I have another thing to say:

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